Baby "HOPE" GROWS STRONGER

As Bethany is now in her 26th week, Miss Campbell HOPE Good is giving hard kicks and seems to have her particular likes and dislikes. When her mamma does yoga -- she gets really involved and starts kicking up a storm. She seems to like their dog, Dirvey, who enjoys snuggling up next to her in her momma's tummy. I'm not sure Baby Hope likes going to school each day -- it was a really tough week for Bethany and her -- but she's a bit too young for K-4th, anyway. Not sure she likes morning and afternoon bus duty any more than her momma does.


Bethany had to go for an unexpected ultrasound and the tech said Campbell was yawning. I can't imagine what that would have been like for Terry and I to see Bethany or Marshall so vividly. -- in our day ultrasounds were pretty blurry and fuzzy.







Meanwhile, we're all working on our projects for her arrival. Bethany has been antiquing letters for her room decor, I've made 27 yards of polka dot piping and
am crocheting frantically to complete her afghan. Mat's gonna do the painting and Spring Break we want to get the bedding complete and the room set up.



We continue to thank God for each day Campbell has to grow and become strong!
God is at work in all of this and HE makes all things GOOD and WONDERFUL!!!

Psalm 139

It's been a good week . . .

I got this return call last Sat. night and it was our little friend telling us she was excited to have "Aunty Jan Day" with me on her NO SCHOOL DAY on Monday -- our President's Day vacation
These are special times for the two of us -- we do projects, make a regular trip to Wal-Mart, talk a lot and keep this whole routine she likes to do every time she comes to our house. Ten minutes before her mom picked her up she looked up at me hinting for a sweet snack and said, "I thought we'd get to make some chocolate chip cookies while I was here." She didn't buy my explanation that Uncle Terry and I had given up cookies in pursuit of a leaner body.

She makes up stories for me and I find myself caught up in her tales and trying to get her to embellish them a little more. Our little friend can see the whole world in a lady bug, a patch of wild strawberries or some small acorns on the driveway. When I spend time with her, observing life from the eyes of a six yr. old, I get caught up in the "real stuff" of life and all the other big people stuff doesn't seem to matter so much.

It was a great way to celebrate the Presidents with a precocious little gal who could some day could be the leader of the free world.

The rest of the week, my classes went well - -
In my life skills class we're finishing up a parenting unit -- and passed "Baby Think It Over" around the room on Thursday. (With everything that has happened with Bethany -- I had to wait a bit before continuing this unit.)
Every two minutes the students would have to hand it off to another person to care for -- which would make the baby start to scream and wail again. The person then tries to feed, burp, rock or change the baby's diaper (which has an electronic sensor sewn in). If the head falls slightly it makes the baby really angry and it cries for two more minutes. This went on for three class periods. By the end of it all, my nerves were shot and I wanted to scream and wail myself!!!

Marinelle and I hope that these babies will teach a powerful lesson about waiting for parenthood; This afternoon a gal in her Parenting and Child Develoment Class who was required to take the baby home for a 24-hour period, rushed back in an hour after school the "mechanical baby" screaming. She asked for Mrs. M, moaning, "I can't take it any longer -- I'm gonna have to give this kid back -- I'm never having kids!!!" Evidentally the controls got stuck and the two-minute crying jag went on for two to three hours.

Today was senior take-over day -- my Youth Alive President, Sydney, was "Mrs. Bell" She started each class for me and helped me get a lot of notebooks graded and earned lunch out with me for all her hard work!!!


Best news of the week -- today I got an invitation to Bethany's baby shower in Kansas City !!!Tomorrow she will be at 25 weeks. Campbell Hope is up to one pound three ounces the perinatologist reports.
Bethany plans to return to her teaching post this next Monday morn. Her special friends from Tulsa are joining her today for a gal's weekend in KC. BTW on THursday night Bethany and Mat found out French Silk pie makes "Baby Hope" really active!!!
. . .Thinking she must have a sweet tooth like her Granny Jan!

UPDATE

Just got a text msg. from Bethany and Mat. They were leaving the perinatologist visit. He is the doctor that did the ultra sound two weeks ago when their loss was discovered.
This week he reported that Campbell has grown the appropriate amount, weighs about 1 lb. 3 oz, is normal size and says overall things look good. He went on to say that each day they get further past when they lost Parker, their chances of NOT losing Campbell increase. Still some unknowns, but they were pleased with the appointment!
Tomorrow is their visit with the OB Specialist for at-risk pregnancies.


This grandmother spent her President's day vacation working on the Baby Hope Nursery Project -- cutting the pieces for the crib accessories!

Thank you all for your continued prayers.

UPDATE

I love symbols. I see them in the Word everywhere. When our kids are going through a rough time and in need of more prayer I often wear a piece of jewelry that they gave to me to remind me to talk to God on their behalf that day. Mat's mother, Jan, gave me a Pandora bracelet for Christmas and so I decided we both needed this precious little girl charm to honor Parker and be a visual reminder to be in constant prayer for Baby Hope.

Bethany has continued this week to follow the course of walking, rest, lots of water and protein shakes. Baby Hope (Campbell Hope Good) has become more active and likes to start her kicking at about 5 am. We feel these are all good signs and praise God for her activity. She maintains a steady heartbeat of 145 - 151!

The verse that came this morning was "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb." Psalm 139:13
I asked God to knit her together well and strong and healthy while I keep knitting on her blanket and that we'd do this project together -- I'd knit with these beautiful pastel yarns and pray -- as He did his wonderful miracle with our Baby Hope knitting her spirit and flesh.

In the next four days Bethany and Mat have three different doctor visits to evaluate the situation and map a plan for the remaining weeks of this pregnancy. Please pray for the doctors attending them to have wisdom and sensitivity to their situation.
Thank you for your kind words and prayers . . . they have been so appreciated this week as it has been a time when Parker's loss was felt more keenly by all of us.

Thank you God for your hand of protection and surrounding love over our kids and granddaughters -- both Campbell and Parker, who is now with you. I love the prayer that my friend Dana wrote about our Father God playing with Baby Parker.

. . . Holy women of the past who put their HOPE in God. . . 1 Peter 3:5
I found that passage this week as I read verse after verse about HOPE . . .

I was reminded of Hannah and The Shunamite woman -- I've mentioned them before in my blogs -- they are my heroines in the Scriptures because both were women who wanted children so very badly and prayed in faith for those children.

The Doppler device came in yesterday afternoon and Bethany put it to good use -- checking Baby Hope's heartbeat several times -- loud and clear 153!!! How much that little machine the size of an old transistor radio keeps our hope strong.

Prayers are literally being offered up around the world. So many people have connected to family and friends and asked them to pray. Her daddy and I are awed by the responses of so many.

. . . This momma hates to go home today and leave her precious kids . . . I'm seeing them trust and rely on the ONE in whom they have put their HOPE.

BABY HOPE

So many different comfirmations of the Word "HOPE" have been sent during the past 36 hours. Two of Bethany's best friends have dreamed of little baby girls named "HOPE". These same precious gals sent Iris to Bethany b/c that flower symbolizes HOPE. Another friend called today to describe a dream about her baby and that baby's name was "Hope".

The HOPE scripture had been so strong in my mind for several hours.
For now, Mat and Bethany are calling their little daughter "Baby Hope" instead of Baby A as the clinicians had termed her. Every medical person who examines Bethany talks about how active and what a fighter she is. Yesterday's heartbeat indicated that.
KEEP IT UP -- Baby HOPE! We love you soooooo much!

Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my HOPE comes from him.
Psalm 62:5

BEATING STRONG 130-140 beats/min

Just a quick update -- the doppler reading today for our baby was a very strong 130-140. One technician couldn't be sure if it was Bethany's heartbeat or baby's, which made Bethany anxious -- A second one came in, took the reading and when asked if it was indeed the baby's or Bethany's heart we were hearing -- said "If it was YOUR heart -- we'd have to rush you to ICU." Yes, this is a good strong heartbeat. She's sounds good! What an awesome lady -- she loved on Bethany , gave her a direct line to her personal phone and told her to call and come in any time she felt anxious. I said she wanted to take care of her during this time. Just what this momma and grandmomma needed to hear.
Thank you Lord!

HOPE

It's early -- we're waiting for a trip to the OB's office at 9:30 to do a doppler check on our tiny precious one's heartbeat -- and then later today we're anticipating the arrival of a doppler machine by express mail. These past 48 hours my thoughts can be described as hanging on one word "hope" One verse keeps running through my head:

And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

If only I could take this pain away from our kids, I would do it in a nanosecond. It is gut-wrenching to watch your children in anguish yet at the same time . . .

Watching them trust in their God, leaning on prayer and the prayers of so many others who have responded to their needs, touches me deeply and restores my spirit.

HOPE it's a power-packed word -- but behind it is the Living GOD in whom we trust and HOPE. We trust HIS will to be good and perfect. . . that puts confidence in our HOPE. We allow Him to be Sovereign.

SCRUBS

Marshall, came in from Denver on Tuesday about three hours after we got to KC.

Monday night he had been at the hospital on a "post-call shift" --left about 10 pm --to get 4 1/2 hours of sleep and then made it back to the hospital to check on his patients. He explained Bethany's situation to his Attending Physician and discovered this doctor's wife had gone through this with their twins. He allowed Marshall to leave right then. He didn't go back to his house -- called me from the hospital and said he was coming also, if we didn't think that would be too overwhelming for Bethany and Mat -- We chose not to tell the kids -- and inwardly knew what a blessing he would be to the both of them. His coming was a welcome surprise.

Marshall had gone to work that morning in scrubs-- grabbed a few more pair for the trip -- didn't even get a coat and started the nine-hour drive. When he arrived dressed like that, we all tried to share clothes -- he insisted that he was comfortable just as he was. He was what we all needed and as we gathered around the dining table on Tuesday night, Bethany thanked her Father God that her family was with her and that her brother had made the trip. Marsh brought such optimism and hope to the whole family.

He took off for home at about 11 am this morning still in scrubs, having borrowed a coat from Mat. He called last night to say he had been pulled over somewhere in Kansas for speeding. He said the officer asked him WHY he was dressed like that -- he explained the situation -- and the officer said his wife had experienced a similar one. He gave him a warning and kindly sent him on his way.

We had prayed for Marshall's safe return. . . and we got even more God used a set of scrubs to open doors and find even yet another person who had endured the same trial.

Bethany's Update

For those of you who would like to keep abreast of what has happened with Bethany in the last 24 hours, here is her updated blog from this morning in it's entirety. She and Mat remain ever so grateful for the prayers, love and support they have received from so many.
They don't take your prayers lightly -- knowing full well that HE is in control.
I am staying on in KC until the weekend.

First and foremost I want to say a HUGE thank you to everyone who commented on the last blog. There is no way I could personally contact each of you, but every single comment, brought tears to my eyes and hope to my heart. Knowing that there are literally people all over the world praying for this teeny-tiny little person inside me right now is the most surreal feeling. Thank you for your thoughts, prayers, words & scriptures.


Yesterday we had a follow-up with the OB. Ours is out of town, so we saw a different dr. who was fantastic. She squeezed us in between C-sections and gave us all the time in the world. Twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome is incredibly rare. So rare in fact that she MIGHT see 1 case in 10 years. (We just keep blowing the odds - first twins, then identical, then ttts - geez. Well FYI we are going to keep blowing the odds when this little miracle is born) Since it is so incredibly rare, questions are hard to answer and best left up to our perinatologist. Anyways. Through her help and the help of our fabulous "virtual" OB & family friend Jenny Keller in Vermont, we have learned that if we can make it to 25 weeks her chances drastically go up. (25 weeks for a singleton is more like 23-24 for a twin - so ideal would be 26-27.) At that point she has approximately 80% chance of survival if we can get steroids going and all goes well after she is born. Of course, if she isn't ready to come out yet - then we want her to stay nice and cozy inside me. I will be going in every other week for a special ultrasound at the perinatologist in which they measure the direction of the blood flow through her heart. If it goes in the right direction, fantastic. If not, we start steroid therapy immediately and I will be induced. We are very blessed that the hospital I was planning on delivering at has the best NICU around- so if we end up needing to use it, it's the best place for her. The unfortunate thing is that I could lose her in the next few weeks and not have any of the typical signs of losing a baby, so my doctor has offered for me to come in for daily fetal heart rate checks if I want. We went a step BEYOND that a just rented the silly machine so I can do it 10 times a day if I want. The doctor has me at home for the next 2 weeks, but not on bed rest. We need blood flow to be happening for her to have her best chances at life, so I am supposed to go on short walks (yeah a year ago I was training like crazy to run the big Sur Marathon. Now I get to walk to the corner and back - funny how life changes) and be moderately active while getting extra rest & tons of hydration (no exercise, no lifting, no cleaning, no added stress) but being completely sedintary hurts her chances. Mat has been doing some research and found out about a therapy that could be optional at this point. So he will be doing a follow-up with our perinatologist today to discuss pursuing that. Unfortunately, he couldn't be with me on Monday at the perinatologist's visit. We had no reason to think anything was wrong and he can only get off for so many appointments and have any type of paternity leave left over - so he wasn't there to ask the right questions and I was too emotional to do so. I always joked with him about his role was as my husband not as my doctor. Now I am so glad to have him as both.


As far as complications after birth, we aren't even going there right now. We are obviously going to love this baby no matter what. That clearly goes without saying. We will cross any and all bridges at the time they arise. As any parent would, we are praying for her to be 100% healthy and strong. We are believing that she will have a mighty story to tell one day. The important thing is to focus on Baby A and staying strong and optimistic for her. One of the biggest things both our virtual OB and our doctor have said is to stay positive - it really does make a difference for the baby. Night before last I dreamed that I was feeding a beautiful baby girl with blond curls. I am choosing to believe that dream will become very real soon. (For some reason she was in dorky clothes and I was feeding her cocoa-puffs, but whatever, she was ours and with US)


Mat and I have been so incredibly touched over the past few days. While we find ourselves tearing up randomly as we think about losing Baby B, we are overwhelmed at the kindness of our friends and family. Honestly, I can't really going into the pain of losing Baby B right now on a blog. At times I find myself not being able to breathe as I try to take it all in. As so many who have experienced the devastating pain of loosing a baby have expressed, it is too intimate for words - at least right now for me it is. That time will come and I am sure I will share parts of it. Right now the experience has to do with the dichotomy of losing one baby while fervently fighting for the life of another.


Currently our house is engulfed in a garden of beautiful flowers from friends and family. We had an incredibly yummy dinner brought in by one of my best friends last night. My parents drove up from Oklahoma. My brother drove in from DENVER and shocked the pants off me - and of course made me start crying, again. 3 of my best friends in Oklahoma have vowed to drive up at a moments notice if need be. We've had phone calls, emails, texts, voicemails and we are feeling so incredibly loved and supported. We've heard about churches and small groups all over the world - literally - praying for our little girl. Through all of this, we are learning to let go and let God. (I know, I know, I sound like a cheesy sign at church, but that is truly what my heart is learning right now) There is nothing we can do except pray and stay positive. At church we've been talking a lot about how Jesus alone is enough. I woke up thinking about that this morning - no matter what may happen, we have Jesus. This promise calms me in the scary times when I start to think, "what if..." His love has been made so incredibly real to us over the past day and half that it just makes me weepy.
Through devastation and heart break we have felt so much love and hope. A dear friend of mine shared this scripture with me yesterday:


When you pass through the waters I will be with you,
and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned,
the flames will not set you ablaze.
For I am the Lord, your God, The Holy One of Israel,
your Savior.
Isaiah 43: 2-3


I've always intended not to get "preachy" on my blog, but this scripture filled me with peace yesterday. Thank you to all of you - you have touched us beyond words.

My heart is heavy and my mind is on overload. One of our granddaughters has not survived. Bethany is 22 weeks and will need to be very careful for the next few weeks. We ask your prayers for this very special granddaughter yet to be born.
The doctor used the term twin to twin transfusion syndrome. We're trusting God.

At the same time early this morning that I was awake and blogging so was our sweet Bethany. I have included her words because I am asking that you all stand in prayer for the specific things she is asking:

It's 3:36 am and my mind won't stop racing. We found out yesterday afternoon at our ultrasound with the perinatologist that we lost one of the twins. It was absolutely devastating news. It's a whole other story, that I can't go into right now. It looks like the girls were identical twins and suffered from twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome in which one baby gets more of the nutrients than the other. Having identical twins is pretty rare, unfortunately, having this icky disease is not. The highest time of risk is between 16 and 24 weeks. We were originally told that our babies didn't fall into this category and that it wasn't anything to worry about. Clearly the events at yesterday's appointment were completely off our radar.

We are crushed to say the least. While we rejoice in the life of our other baby (Baby A), we morn for the one we lost (Baby B). (** Please not that the names A & B have nothing to do with the events, it is simply what they doctor's call them based on their position inside my uterus) I have so many questions and feelings whirling around in my brain, I don't even know where to start with that. The past 2 1/2 weeks have been such a roller coaster of emotions. We are just kind of a big fat mess right now, not knowing which way to think or feel at times. Confusion. Hurt. Sadness. Questions. Concern.
While I could write on and on trying to clear my head, I need to ask you - whoever you are reading our blog- to stand in prayer for Baby A. It seems that Baby A is now at an increased risk of not surviving. She is also at an even more increased risk of developing neurological complications or cerebral palsy. The next 2 1/2 weeks are critical. I don't think there will be a time in the pregnancy where we will be "out of the woods" from what I understand. Some of the complications might not appear until after she is born. It's a wait and see type game where there isn't a whole lot we can do - other than pray. Mat and I firmly believe in the power of prayer and ask you to pray specifically for the following things:
-Pray for the strength of this little girl, Baby A. She is quite a little fighter.
-Pray for her continual development, both physically and mentally.
-Pray for the doctor's that we will be seeing over the next few weeks.
-Pray for us to have insight and wisdom as to do what is best for her.

The verse I am focusing on and praying over Baby A right now is:
"May the God of Hope fill you with joy and peace as you trust in him, that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

We firmly believe that God won't give us more than we can handle- whatever that may be. We are staying positive and sending lots of love and positive energy to this little girl. We ask you to do the same. We need to hear positive stories right now, success stories.

We have already been touched with so many kind words, phone calls, texts, e-mails, offers of food, prayer support etc. My family is on their way into town and we know without a doubt that we aren't going through this alone.

Terry and I love you all and are so blessed to have family we can ask this request of.

Treasures of the Snow - Job 38

He spreads the snow like wool and scatters the frost like ashes. Psalm 147:15-17

What is it about a snow day that makes us all feel like celebrating? We always get out the hot chocolate, make soup -- and even cook a big breakfast! Haven't done "SomeMores" or hot dogs in the fireplace -- but that would be a great option!

My students, who did show up on Thursday, were all wired -- certain that they wouldn't be back to school on Friday (of course, here in OK we tend to call things off well before the first flakes start to fall and on Wed. night the Governor did declare a state of emergency - the reason for so many absences) -- I gave my usual warnings -- "You're not the experienced driver you think you are -- drive like you have an egg under your foot -- no quick braking -- no sudden acceleration -- don't over correct if you start to spin just enjoy the ride (maybe that wasn't the best advice)-- BE CAREFUL and I want to see you all back here on Monday".


For us teachers -- it's that unexpected time off to catch up -- We got off an hour early so I loaded up my briefcase with papers to grade and a new curriculum to work into presentations --
knowing full well, that I was going to crash for the evening and get back into bed b/c I had been going to work for three days with some sort of "bug" -- achy, chilling and my head feeling like it was five times it's size.

I got home to find that my friend, Nancy, had sent the best chili and cornbread even with grated cheese to top it all off -- What a doll! We'd been living off last Saturday's potato soup and some chicken & noodles Terry had made on Tuesday!




On what day does the exhilaration of a snow day turn into "cabin fever"?
Snowbound Day 1 -
Sat in front of the fire, logging entries into Excel to figure our 2009 taxes. Something about going over the bank statements every year brings back so many memories. I saw meals out with Marshall when he came home or we went to OKC - I found ones for trips to KC and places we went with Bethany & Mat. 'Made me miss the kids -- so I decided to cook -- put in a little turkey breast and that made the house smell wonderful!

Snowbound Day 2 - looks promising
Last Saturday's garage purge -- makes me want to clean a few closets and toss some more stuff-- I have clothes older than our soon-to-be 30 yr. old daughter! -- but, in starting to sort - I found some baby fabric my Mom passed down -- what could I make for the little "Goodlets" with that? I PROMISE 2010 will be the year of the great garage sale! (didn't happen last year, it seems)

I need to get some food cooked for tomorrow's potluck -- wonder if anybody will be able to make it to services? -- On the days we have a Church fellowship after being holiday- or snow-bound everybody is thrilled to be together.

HMMMMM Day 3 is when "cabin fever" starts to set in for me" that's tomorrow -- good we'll be out by then! I still have my lesson to plan for tomorrow's Primary class-- it was to be Jesus calming the storm -- think -- we'll look at how many mentions of weather and science there are in Job, as well. The kids should be REALLY wired after three days cooped up inside! (kinda' like me :-)

Terry and I have prayed for what God needs us to be about during this time . . . and we have continued to thank HIM that we have power, that we are warm inside and have all that we need and even MORE than we need.



Maybe the best thing about snow days are that they force us to stop our routine -- realize that it's not the local meteorlogist but God that controls the climate and weather and to consider the greatest lesson the snow brings to mind:
We have JESUS -- our salvation -- who washes our sins WHITE AS SNOW!

Through the Roof

Things were going well with my Primaries this morning in Sunday school -- it was one of those lessons that I knew I could get all my kids involved in and really be able to drive home the point of the Bible story. We started with an application activity using wet paper towels and rocks on which they'd written burdens people have to carry and discussed how heavy those can be for people to deal with. We talked about friends helping friends with their problems. (NOTE: The super paper towels today are as strong as the commercials say they are! It began to look like they were going to hold up to all the rocks (problems) we'd been piling on (and NOT tear under the weight of too many "burdens" -- should have practiced that one ahead of time!)

We then read the passage in Luke 5 about the four friends who brought their paralyzed friend to Jesus. The boys and girls were connecting well -- we discussed what it would feel like to be the man as they carried him through Capernaum -- what must have been in the friend's minds as they hurried their friend to Jesus and what the owners of the house must have thought when the guys started dismantling their roof.

Tori volunteered to be the paralyzed man as we acted it out -- she loved the idea of being wrapped up in a blanket, carried by four of us and hoisted up on the roof of our makeshift "house" (two tables pushed together).
Once we got her on one of the tables and I reminded them it was the house where Jesus was down below healing the sick, I asked them how we were going to get her down to see Jesus -- were we just going to toss her down? (No, the men in the story let their friend down with ropes, I added) Tori was poised on one table and the students pulled the other table away to make room for us to let her down and at that very instant the table collapsed and the legs fell off with the loudest racket -- the kids were stunned!!! Without missing a beat Luke yelled "Oh, no --you just smashed Jesus!"

Fran and I lost it! We're not quite sure what they took home from the lesson from that time on. These kids give me so much joy and I'd like to think they make God grin . . .

Meme

The kids called her “Meme” -- I came to call her “Mom” – and soon she found her own special place in my heart.
Today would have been her 83rd birthday. She is my mother-in-love. The last 15 years Meme was confined to her bed, so I'd sit in the small chair at the end of it –knitting or doing handwork of some sort – we’d talk about raising kids and husbands and recipes and girl things. She was always so eager to know what was happening in my life. Going to Burkburnett, where they lived for so many years, was always a boost for my mental outlook. . .we'd have these long chats, the kids would play, I’d cook up something I knew they liked, and we’d all enjoy a brief, but enriching family time.

I remember so many things about her:
>Her hands – she always had the most beautifully manicured hands. I remember her as classy – I tell our own daughter she favors her grandmother in that way.



>Her tender heart – children, animals and people in need of a hand-up.

>She always gave me the benefit of the doubt. . . not sure I always deserved it.

>She made the best pies . . . her French Coconut and Buttermilk were the best!

>She wasn’t real big on birthdays – but one time when we were coming through – she got up into her wheelchair – rolled into the kitchen and made me an Italian Cream Cake. It’s been my favorite ever since.

>Holidays she and Pop would cook together. She would rest and save her strength and then roll up to a special counter he’d built to accommodate her chair and they’d cook together. They always made this cornbread stuffing and got the turkey on. (not always agreeing on what should be included in the recipe.) When she died I asked for the apron she always wore. . . I didn’t want to wash it because it still smelled like her kitchen.

>One time when we breezed through there for an overnight on our way to Illinois to spend a few days with my family, she gave the kids a treasure box full of little gifts for the long ride. She knew how long 16 hours in a car could be for children, so she wrapped up a present for every hour or two. It would be something like a pack of gum or a .50 toy or small pack of crayons. They were overjoyed and I remember that trip went much more smoothly. Even though she wasn't going to have as much time with our kids, she selflessly gave so much to make them happy.

>She loved to sing hymns! When she could get us all to sing together it made her the happiest. She would have “singings” after church in their home. She’d make something simple – like baked cinnamon toast. On the day she died we all sang the songs we thought she loved the most and she seemed to linger a little longer.

>She traveled the world with her military man and Terry always said she made moving seem like an adventure.


>She collected people. Her home was always open to them. She had this sense about what they needed. When President Kennedy was shot, she was concerned for the wife of his assassin, Marina Oswald she and wrote to her expressing condolensces for her in her loss as well.


>Mom coped with a disabling disease – she contracted polio in her mid-teens. At which time she was told she would never walk again. Within a year she was walking. . .. and later would ride bikes with her kids . As she grew older the challenges to her health multiplied, once again affecting her ability to walk as post-polio syndrome set in. She hated those crutches and on our wedding day didn’t want to be photographed with them. Having to resort to a wheel chair a few years later and then be confined to her room was even harder for this very active woman.



Pop was devoted to her – and together they endured the challenges that her disease caused in her life.
She taught me so much . . .
She’s standing now . . . in HIS presence . . .
“Her children rise up and call her blessed”. Prov. 31 We all have been blessed by her!

My Man

This is my man 37 years ago on our Wedding Day. He caught my eye when he first spoke at our church my sophomore year of college. I heard him speak and that night prayed, “Lord, I’d like to marry a man like that”.

A year later he came to our church as the youth minister and the rest is history. One day I had to admit to God– I never thought HE would give me THAT man.

Since I married Terry, life has never been boring! We have always had something on the calendar – a dream to pursue – and vision for the future.

I used to marvel at the way God chose to make all the pieces fit in our relationship -- in areas I lacked, he was strong. It’s no secret he hates numbers – and that seems to be one of my stronger areas – He’s big picture person /I’m analytical – He’s philosophical /I’m pragmatic– however, we do have our areas of commonality, also. We share a passion for ministry, wanting to encourage people in their spiritual walk and we love to mentor couples together. . . we both love children and wanted to be parents for the longest time. . . now we’re going to do the grandparent thing together with twins!!!!

We both had parents with a disabling disease, with the other spouse being the caregiver. Terry helped me to understand my Dad’s muscular dystrophy much more completely.

He was the reason things worked so well in our household when we cared for my mother. . . getting up every two hours to turn her from side to side to keep her from getting bed sores. He would check to make certain she was alright and just wanted her to know someone would be coming into her room that often. By bedtime I was exhausted -- he'd take over and not go to bed until after the first turn.

He has this optimism and objectivity when I’m faced with a test or trial – that it’s going to work out – and it’s not worth all the "flap" until we see how things work out. He always helps me see that there are two sides to every situation.

No place was too remote for us to go to. He went to India five times, I went with him three of those (Jokingly he says that when they started taking their wives -- they didn't have to live out in the huts any longer.) He could navigate us through all kinds of airports, train stations and into little villages, finding us a place to stay, creating a temporary home for 2-3 weeks before we moved on to set up the next preacher training school.

One year for our anniversary Terry recorded a favorite song that we used to love to sing back in the 70’s when we first got married and were trekking around the world, “Please Come to Boston”. We’d get in our little Dodge Charger – head off for some distant destination (my man has always loved a road trip) – hear the song on the radio and sing to our heart’s content.
I’d have to say the song I’d pick for him is “Wind Beneath My Wings”. Terry’s always been my biggest encourager. As a young wife and mother, having a lot of self-doubts – he always made me believe I could do anything. He’s helped me develop certain gifts and talents. He loves me dearly – what more could a woman want???

Happy Anniversary --Love YOU, Babe!

'Commands His Angels Concerning You . . .

We were between guests and I was rushing to get the Christmas decorations packed away, since I could then get through the guest bedroom which leads to the attic. My neice and her new husband were coming through to spend the night last night and the house was so badly in need of deep cleaning - I'd finished the vacuuming earlier and had only one more box to take upstairs. I was really gonna' get the house in great shape before Chelle and Michael arrived about bedtime.

Then the unexpected -- as I was rearranging my Christmas stash in the corner of the attic, I stepped back and found myself dangling between the attic floor and the garage below.

All sorts of things came to my mind --
"WHEW, I'm not going all the way through - - -
"Oh no, this is my only pair of jeans and they're ripping on that nail that is holding me."
"Why didn't I bring my cell phone up here with me?"
"Wonder if I broke this hip? -- that will really change my next few weeks!"
"How am I gonna get my other leg untwisted to hoist me up?"
"Wonder if I can walk and get myself downstairs."

My left leg kept me from going on through and when I stood up both legs would still work. . . so I headed for an icebag and decided to stay put until my man got home.

Terry drove into the garage about 15 minutes later - saw all the broken dry wall hanging and the huge gaping hole and thought I had landed in the garage. He rushed in the door hollering, "Are you all right?"

I have to say -- after only 1 1/2 short hours in the ER at St. Francis -- nothing was broken, just a big bump on my upper thigh and a bruise that has become the size of the state of Montanna.

When all was over and we were headed out of the ER, Terry's favorite line for the whole thing was "you always have been able to bring down the house".
I'll let him have one corny line after all he did to take great care of me! :)

When Michael and Chelle arrived and went to the garage for something to drink, he came back and said that judging by all he saw in our garage I'd have really hurt myself if I'd gone through. . . a choice of landing in the plastic recyclables can, snagging myself on the gas-powered weedeater, or landing on the church's lawn mower.

All sorts of lessons I learned yesterday --
> Listen to my husband, he told me he'd help get the Christmas decorations to the attic.
>Slow down, take my cell phone and wait until someone is in the house if I'm going to the attic.

It's amazing how many scriptures on falling were in my quiet time this morning--
thankfully, nothing about being an independent eager beaver that won't wait for help -- I was relieved to see.


He will command his angels concerning you - -

My favorite -- "Even to your old age and gray hairs, I AM HE who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you . . . I will rescue you. Isa 46:4


This gray haired lady better stay off the rafters -- Thank you Lord, for no broken bones!

A New Year

It's a new year -- very little history is written within these first two days of 2010. It's an open road before us. Where will the road lead? Who will become nearer and dearer to us this year? What experiences will HE bring us to and through, to teach us more about HIMSELF? That story is yet to be written.

I was restlessly flipping channels this evening and caught Gloria Gaither sharing that Frances Shaeffer's question "How then shall we live?" deeply impacted her in college and later prompted her to write a song which has become an important close for many of their performances -- I Then Shall Live

What struck a chord with me was her honesty when she said, "I hope people realize that the words to the song, are what I aspire to -- I'm not there all the time -- but this is my heart's desire." She continued with the thought that we have to set our aspirations above and beyond us to become more what we are to be.

It resonated within me so deeply-- the words that I write here in this blog or share with others are not where I live all the time -- but are my heart song that brings me back to what I hope to be in HIM. . . reaching for more of HIM.

What will the New Year bring for any of us? GOD alone knows --
My heart's desire is to live this year as these words from Gloria Gaither --


Gaither Vocal Band I Then Shall Live lyrics

Lyrics

All I Wanted for Christmas

This was taken Christmas morning, the tree was lit, the house was quiet and so was I for the first time since we arrived -- no cooking to do -- hadn't started grading the 50+ semester essays I brought with me - -just time to sit and reflect.

This year I said all I want for Christmas was to be with my family in Denver. When the budget got pretty tight -- my man said -- Denver is still a "go". Our holidays began with great start when Bethany came in Friday the 18th of Dec. for the weekend. Something about her always brings light to the moment.

We took off Tuesday morning the 22nd, at a relaxed slow pace -- weather caused the 10-hour trip to become a 13-hour drive through snow (Terry was elated!) -- so slept in Wed. morning -- (Marshall had to be at work at some horrible hour -- 4:30) -- went to Wal-Mart to stock his cabinets for the holiday "feed-out"-- how does one guy make it on dry noodles, a can of cream of celery soup --and only 2 eggs and jars of half-eaten pasta and picante sauce? I didn't see much of anything to cook WITH, either except three small sauce pans-- so stocked up on aluminum pans and lots of paper goods.


Marshall had planned all along to host Christmas Eve for the Bell / Good Clan --
When I'd ask him what he wanted to serve -- all I could get out of him was: sausage balls, green bean bundles and pies.

He did, however, have all the decorating covered -- I was impressed -- the tree was decorated nicely --he'd bought stockings for each of us and a strand of lights was up his little patio. Every time we talked on the phone he'd mention the holidays.


The snow continued Tuesday night and all day Wednesday with Terry loving every minute of it -- remembering all his days growing up in Colorado Springs and Denver. Manuvering our little PSSAT through the snow, I wishing for something a little sturdier with a four-wheel drive and that he'd toss that crazy GPS tracking application he'd just downloaded to his phone in order to help us navigate.

(another memory of this holiday will be Bethany and I wandering through the Wal-mart parking lot with him using the "find my car" feature that came with his new download. Both of us were fuming and frustrated that he purposefully did not note where he'd left the car. The application was way off and had us 450 feet from our car when we could see it.) -- it'll go down in our family stories and I'm sure be embelished somewhat.




Marshall's Christmas Eve party came off very well -- he got home from working the trauma unit at Denver General in good time to enjoy it, opened his fridge and said --it's so good to have food in here -- makes this place less depressing.




Jim and Jan brought the most delicious stone crab and we all pounded away to get to those delicious tidbits. Jim's sauce was out of sight!!






We had a great day with our kids at Mat's parents with lots of time for loving, laughing and trying to top each other's stories. Marshall was able to get off by 11:00 Christmas morning and we had a tree, stockings and lots of scrumptious food
Jim and Jan had so carefully planned and prepared.

Bethany and Terry prepared their traditional Chocolate Pecan Fudge Pie mid-afternoon. 'Not sure which of them enjoys this tradition the most!



Sitting around the dining table Christmas night sharing spiritual insights of Jesus life was a moment I believe we will all cherish.

Bethany and Mat had to leave for KC on Sunday before noon - Marshall had a long 30 hour shift so we didn't get to see him between Friday night and Sunday noon. Of course, holiday shifts at the hospital are short staffed and he was on his feet with five pagers buzzing the whole time. (I think he thrives on the excitement.)




Marshall's laundry caught up, it was time to tackle the remodel he was doing upstairs in his condo. He kept saying, "Mom, if you're bored you can sand on the wall" (partially teasing -- but needing the help) Hand sanding is one of those things I put on par with a root canal... necessary but AWFUL -- so I chose to grade those 50+ semester exam essays, instead. Tuesday the 29th was the first of Marshall's holiday so we ran errands, went out to eat Mexican food, made numerous trips to Lowe's and finished sanding, texturing and painting two walls so he could move back upstairs. (All this to remove wall to wall mirrors in his bedroom) We hung the blinds about 9 pm that night -- called the project complete and dropped into bed exhausted -- with him very excited to now be able to move back upstairs.

Wednesday morning bright and early we headed for home . . . It's the longest we've been away from home in some time and I found myself not wanting to totally unpack that night because it would mean the end to a great family time together. I just wanted to live in the glow of it all. . . Yes, I got what I asked for . . . time with my family all together!
Thank you, Lord.

Something Better

In my preschool curriculum, each lesson is preceded by a teacher's devotional segment. I have found these to be pertinent and oftentimes quite appropriate for what I was working through at the time.

The teacher notes for "Walls of Jericho" did just that for me:

"The trumpets sounding in front of God's Ark proclaimed that God's presence was there! As the Ark moved, His glory literally, visibly, moved around those impregnable walls. And that final shout? It was a shout of faith -- it celebrated what had not even happened yet. And it came from the whole nation as one voice, in complete unity. What situation in your life seems as impenetrable as the walls of Jericho? God gives us a plan worth considering. When we are obedient, we bring His presence into the situation. Every time we "walk around it," every time we talk or think about it, we can announce by our attitude of confidence in Him that God is at work there. In faith, we can celebrate what we don't yet see happening. Our hearts are prepared to recognize His amazing power and rejoice in seeing how HE changes the situation."

Our church family will celebrate a 10-year anniversary next month and has been struggling with a-long awaited ministry breakthrough for some time . . . a dream we've begun to wonder if we would ever see come to reality. It's been a trying year with lots of reversals in our plans to build a church building on a cherished piece of property. We have looked to it as our promised land.

I love the 11th chapter of Hebrews because it's faith stories of pepole who had to wait . . .

Of Moses, it reads -- he persevered because he saw HIM who is invisible.

The people mentioned in this great Hall of Faith chapter were cited for something that they did by faith in obedience.

I don't always understand God's timetable and I'm not always the most patient person when I have to wait -- but I do understand what helps the wait -- careful obedience and a clear view of HIM.

THe Sovereignty of God is made evident in a verse from this selection that makes me pause: All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance.
Elsewhere in that chapter, it says,These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised. God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.

When I see that even way back then, we're mentioned --God planned something better for us --
JESUS -- OUR sins covered by HIS blood --
abundant FREEDOM now --


It puts a new perspective of whatever answer to prayer we're waiting on at the moment --

It's two days until the day we celebrate HIS birth -- let's celebrate THE Gift we've been given. The GIFT that people long ago lived in faith anticipating and believed in so strongly that they would give their lives for --- believing HIM who is faithful.

Whatever breakthrough or answer we're waiting on -- I am convinced once again to wait in faith believing that HE will do what is best for all of us so that HIS purposes can be accomplished.

Tie-Dye Angels at the Manger

Well the kids did WOW us all -- I saw the light of Jesus in so many places . . . and I think He grinned, maybe just outright belly laughed!

Images still in my mind:





Seven 7 little tie-dyed preschool angels with white organza wings sitting quietly on a bench waiting for their time to go on -- knowing they would get their "light of the world" flashlights when it was all over if they did their best. . . Cheezits crackers helped make the wait bearable. . .thank you, Jenny, for your patient teaching -- how do you do it?





>one "tired-of-it all" two year old -- having a meltdown in the back of the sanctuary tossing his wiseman figurine and wailing -- "I don't want to be an angel!"

>two precious little girls being a part of it for the first time-- with no tears!!!




>hearing four-year old Roman - say "I am the Good Shepherd -- the Shepherd lays down his life for his sheep." His great big banner almost eclipsed his precious little face!
































>watching all my primary kids say their scripture lines perfectly beforehand!














We had big kids too, (high schoolers) presenting the names -- kids whom I remember taking part in Christmas plays many years ago when they were this age. (two of whom were tiny angels that got into a struggle on stage --now grown up and beautiful!)



"RAD" CHAD REPORTING LIVE FROM LPCF BETHLEHEM


One of the sweetest parts was having our own angel daughter there to take these pictures and enjoy the children with us.




It's the same birth story every advent -- but each year seeing new little faces light up with the telling of HIS story truly carries the message "the LIGHT has come!"