Now to HIM who is able to keep you from falling -- Jude 24 is a verse I used to claim for my mother as her ability to walk and move was being diminished.
I thought of that this morning as I was talking things over with God -- ME telling HIM --
I was bummed that my school year now has a different beginning never mind that I started this job 13 years ago with the OTHER ankle broken and in a cast. . .
Or that we were accumulating a closet of those big ankle boots -- luckily Terry is now out of his -- and moving around better than he has in months.
At our kids' suggestion -- we've decided our Christmas picture needs to be T & me in our ankle boots.
This has got me to thinking --
WHAT REALLY IS THE MOST IMPORTANT?
ALL THAT RUSHING ABOUT -- FOR DEADLINES I'VE CREATED -- WHAT IS REALLY THE MOST NEEDFUL?
When I fell it was b/c I had spent the day rushing around to finish a lot of outside chores so we could get off for CO earlier than planned -- I was taking T out to see my finished pool painting. Hmmm, Jan do you see the correlation -- a lot of your falls come after you've been rushing about all day???
I don't want this time on my back with my foot higher than my heart -- on an ice bag (following Dr. Marshall Bell's orders as well as the ankle surgeon) --I don't want this time to be lost. . .what can this time of slowing down to for my list of "MUST DO's"?
It drives me nuts that I can't clean or even sweep the kitchen floor -- Loading the dishwasher takes 3 times as long! (I insist Terry LET me do that)
You should have seen T & me in Wal-Mart yesterday with me trying to keep from running over people with the motorized handi-cap cart --and T getting hit by someone else in a handi-cap cart letting their child drive it.
Terry took a video of me driving and said I shot across an aisle without even looking -- he seemed to try to stay as far away from me as he could
the fact that the pic is blurred I think has something to do with the whole problem of controlling it's speed |
(I sort of got an inkling of how it feels to be the person in a wheelchair having people treat you differently -- i.e. the irritable cashier in the quick lane when I hadn't kept my items moving so she could scan them -- thanks to the guy behind me in another handicap cart who pushed them forward) -
Right now I feel pretty vulnerable -- facing -- 120 students for the first time on a scooter -- I always think it's important to at least LOOK like you're in charge when you start the year.
I've lost a week of pre-start preparations -- (which Bethany helped me reclaim on Friday)
First bulletin board up -- launching Single Survival Course |
I alternate between brain fog from pain meds and weepiness from frustration. I basically had to tell God I'm pretty helpless at this point.
My biggest decisions right now are pretty basic -- which boot would I be able to stay in an entire day -- the short or high-top? Where can I set up a place under my desk to keep my foot propped up and iced while I lecture? AND Where in the world is that basket we used with Mom's walker?
I have been blessed with a doting husband who continuously wants to know what he can do --
Bethany who runs all my errands and brings the girls by to a pick me up (Campbell is the best nurturer -- she continually covers my foot up -- gives it a kiss and checks to see what I need)
We're forever grateful for Marshall and Katie buying last-minute air tickets to come see US when we couldn't go to THEM . . and then working to help us get set up for the week.
Special thanks to my co-workers who are helping it all come together for show time on Thursday morning-- and my sweet hairdresser, Joelle!
I 'm learning that the best way is to say "Yes" when someone offers to do something and to ASK for what is out of reach not try to get it myself. AND to lock the brakes on my scooter before I get off it --
Right after this happened and the pain set in -- I thought -- this is one broken spot -- what must it be like for those people in car wrecks with multiple breaks??? or People who have such horrible diseases or people who go through these things all alone??
And yes, though this is taking a lot of my energy and effort now --
and is a delay in MY plans --in 6 months or even weeks it will be only a memory and a dull ache every time the weather changes -- just a tiny blipp -- on my time line.
I have given so many people the words from Col. 1:17 -- "In HIM all things come together" I'd say those are gonna have to be my "marching orders" (or scooting ones) for the next few weeks.
AND NO -- LIFE IS NOT BETTER in FLIP FLOPS -- that's how I broke both ankles
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